Geek Chic

I went to the eye doctor for the first time in 6 years yesterday. I've been a bad patient. Naughty Jenna. (Insert spank here) Anywho, I went, finally.

So, I sit in the chair and look through the first machine and see a pretty picture with a barn as the Dr. explains that he is checking my eye for my far sightedness and my ummmmm astigmatism? "Do you know what that is?" he asks. He says your eye is not round, its kind of bumpy. Great, I have a bumpy eye. I immediatly think of my stomach from last week when it was burned and then I got all sweaty and got water bumps (dont pretend this has never happened to you) and it was all gross and bumpy. Awesome, that is what my eye looks like. Great. And I have been told my eyes are my best feature, so what does that say about the rest of me? Wow, I must be a looker if my bumpy eyes are the best thing I have to offer. Its no wonder I am still single.

So, now all depressed we move on. He asks about my eye drop usage. Like a crack addict I say I use daily. I wake up with itchy eyes people. Well, as it turns out, the drops I use over time will cause the symptoms they are curing and I will have red eyes.

OMG, PERMANENT RED BUMPY EYES!!!!!!! SEXY Y'ALL! Can we say I am a hott piece of a$$!!!

Alright, so I need glasses, shocker. I mean, do I need to wear them all the time to see, no. Should I to be clearer and not strain and get headaches? Yes. So, trying to make myself feel better I am going to get a nice designer pair. Its me, if I have to wear glasses, they are going to say Armani, or Gucci, or Juicy on the side people, lets be honest. So I start looking and I am stressed. Totally overwhelmed. I can't make a decision on where to eat lunch on my own let alone how to spend a couple hundred dollars?!?!?!?!? I call in reinforcements. Friends always help.

I have 2 choices. A classic Juicy metal frame, a little more daily wear. Or a plastic Gucci "Geek Chic" large trendy frame. I hate choices. I am always afraid I am making the wrong one. Always. I let my friend pick. I am happy.

I get home and my family hates the decision. Hates it.

I call, I cancel the order. I ask to hold until I can come back in.

I am starting over and looking more.

I'm never going to decide.

I live my life in limbo because I can't make decisions.

Damn glasses.

And now I am stuck with bumpy eyes, blurred vision, headaches, frustration, no awesome glasses to make me a hott sexy librarian to dress up as. Ya, I was gonna role play. Not sure with whom, but I was gonna make it work for me.

Not sure I can find a way to make the red bumy eyes as sexy.

Damn.